Fight Like a Girl- technically I'm cancer free
It's quiet, except for the dogs playing, they got me up earlier than usual, I guess they thought I needed the brain space to write my next update, so I sit with my laptop and a hot cup of coffee and try to collect my thoughts.
I finished my radiation treatments this week!! The radiation technicians were so kind and compassionate throughout my treatments, they always asked about my family which made me feel like more than a patient chart, like I was a whole person with a life outside of my cancer diagnosis. I liked that. I met with my radiation oncologist on my 2nd last day and we discussed what to expect next. Technically I can be considered cancer free!! I'm relieved that another part of my treatment is finished but I also know I still have about a years worth ahead of me. I still have maintenance infusions every three weeks until November, and echos/ECGs to check my heart every three months. I'll be followed up every three months for a few years then every six months until I reach 5 years being cancer free. I will also be having my ovaries removed next year and hopefully my breast reconstruction too.
Radiation itself was sneakily difficult. The procedure itself was short and painless but the fatigue I feel throughout the day is crushing. My energy levels aren't as low as with chemo but I could nap at any point of the day. I think the driving in alone was part of it. I drove myself for the most part (my Mom drove when they were up to watch the kids when Adam was working) and its a 40min drive each way. Add that to the crummy weather we've been having and I feel like I would rather be hibernating.
Half of my upper chest feels like it's in summer though as right now I have a 'sunburn'. My skin changes are pretty mild so far, although I've been told to expect them to worsen over the next week, its a bit itchy but nothing some cold moisturizer can't help. I keep up on the moisturizer multiple times a day, and continue to stretch. That will keep the scar tissue at bay and provide me with the best chance of a successful reconstruction next year.
Now that my daily trips into the city are over and my parents are no longer needed to watch my kids I guess I'll get a true taste of isolation. The kids are getting a bit antsy with the monotony of every day but we're coping as well as can be expected. They are doing well with their online learning, their teachers have provided a couple hours worth of activities and assignments everyday to help keep them occupied. Some days are easier than others but I think it helps with their daily routine and mine if I'm being honest. Although I say I like the freedom to choose what to do I also really enjoy working within parameters.
When things seem bleak I try to exercise gratitude. I'm grateful to have family and friends who check in on me and who I can call at any time for a chat. I'm grateful for technology and how it can keep us connected, informed and entertained. I'm grateful for the grocery stores being open and clean and I'm also grateful that I need to be more thoughtful about how I shop and what I buy, it's a lesson in mindfulness. I'm grateful that Adam is able to still work and we don't need to worry about finances as well. I'm grateful that I live in Canada and people for the most part are practising proper physical distancing/isolation and PPE which has allowed our 'curve' to begin to flatten. And above all I am grateful that I am still here, pretty much healthy, and able to appreciate it all.
Take care and stay safe
Katie